When I was sixteen I won a great victory. I felt in that moment that I should live to be one hundred, now I know I shall not see thirty.

I have never met another more heartless person than her.

One day, a cunning Brahmin, trying to trick Buddha, asked him, 'Master, do you consider yourself a man or god?'

The Buddha smiled and said, 'Neither. I am just one who has woken you up while the rest of you are still sleeping.'

I guess some things are just not meant to be.

And please remember, that I never lied.

Come the 6th of June this year, I will be playing at the kallang National stadium. Yup, thats right. Thanks to my team manager who works for the youth Olympics committee and pulled some strings, our team will be taking part in a tournament at the national stadium. Actually the occasion is to launch the debut of our new jersey kits but I am more excited about playing at the pitch. The same pitch where Fandi Ahmad scored a scissors kick, Sundram executed his bicycle kick. In some ways, I fulfilled a boyhood Malaysia cup fan dream, to play on the field, just under different circumstances.

My carefully crafted plan is finally bearing some fruit. Hope is on the way.

Things are not looking good.

Like an arrow shot through my heart, I was very sad and disappointed to hear the truth. But as this door closes, another one opens.

Looking forward to this friday.

There'll be a day when you will wish you had done a little evil to do a greater good.

Recently I find myself enjoying novels written by Japanese authors, namely Ryu Murakami and Natsuo Kirino. The stories revolve around mainly teenage girls who are troubled by society, should I say pressured by the educational system there to excel, and instead find themselves turning to booze, sex, drugs and murder as an escape. Not that I find my life parallel to the stories, but I find the concept interesting as compared to western authors.

Technically, after handing in my finally done and dusted final year report today, I should be over the moon. But, tomorrow, I will be in Malacca for a stoopid trip which my dad signed me up and forced me to go. And the fall in timing is 7am somemore, Christ sake. I have been giving him the 'dun talk to me cos I ain't fucking bothered with this trip' attitude since last night. I think he has gotta the idea. But I am gonna continue till I come back on sat night. I will make him regret forcing me along to accompany him for the trip.

Why the emotional outburst? I guess things haven't been easy, things haven't stayed or turned out the way I wanted it to be. But all I know is, it hell ain't gonna be a good friday for me.

Having said that, Good Friday to all the christians out there.

Reading without reflecting is like eating without digesting

I thought ten thousand swords must have leaped from their scabbards to avenge even a look that threatened her with insult. But the age of chivalry is gone.

This time, I know what I am fighting for.

Everything is gonna be alright.